They Give Their All

It is truly humbling to bring home a gift from Haiti. I have had such a hard time collecting my thoughts to share with you all. I have started and erased about 3 times now. There are no words to describe how blessed I feel by the godly women who take care of the kids at Haiti Lifeline Orphanage. Many of them have entrusted their family members to take care of their own children so that they can be with mine. They give their time, their discipline, their love to no end. 

On any given day during my visit, I would leave Christopher playing near the guesthouse and find myself drawn to the second floor dormitory where there are 3 rooms. The baby room (up to about age 3), preschool-age room and kindergarten-age room. Throughout the day the babies and preschoolers will play in their rooms and the open air walkway between. They LOVE visitors and I find myself sitting down quickly so that 3 children can fit on my legs, 1 in each arm and a couple of girls playing with my hair. They crave smiles and tickles and hugs; they can't get enough hugs! It's such a treasure to love on these sweet babies (so many of them have homes in America and that thrills my soul, too).

I am always greeted with a smile by all the mamas. They may be folding clothes, sweeping the floor, getting bottles ready for the babies, braiding hair, sitting down for a quick break OR my favorite time - they're chatting with each other. They motion for me to pull up a bucket and I listen. What they are talking about, I don't usually know, but they are always willing to include me. Sometimes, we try to talk to each other but we never truly understand what the other is saying.  When the time comes, I stand and give hugs all around. I feel loved and accepted by these women and I would love to know their stories and write them for you all. 

As a thank you, I was able to head up cooking them dinner the night before we left. Suffice it to say, God blessed us all through that time together of thanks. Delva (Christopher's room mama) stood up when they were done eating and through a translator told us that the only gift they had to offer in return was a song and a prayer. It was so amazing to hear them sing in unison and hear her powerful prayer in Creole. As the night came to a close, Emily (the missionary that lives there) told me that Delva had something for me. Delva and Mary (Christopher's other room mama) had spent the day making paper flowers for me. I remember seeing them being made and thinking how beautiful they were. The time and money put into such a sweet gift made me cry. I didn't deserve them. These women deserved more of me than I had offered. They gave me their friendship and a gift. It was hard to accept. I had brought Christmas gifts that they will get in December and my gift felt so small in comparison. 

I was reminded of the verses in Mark of the woman who gave more than all the rich combined because she gave it all. Today, in the season of giving, I am humbled by the most valuable gift I have already received. Nothing will quite compare unless I am willing to give my all.


Mark 12:41-44

The Message (MSG)

^41-44 Sitting across from the offering box, he was observing how the crowd tossed money in for the collection. Many of the rich were making large contributions. One poor widow came up and put in two small coins—a measly two cents. Jesus called his disciples over and said, “The truth is that this poor widow gave more to the collection than all the others put together. All the others gave what they’ll never miss; she gave extravagantly what she couldn’t afford—she gave her all.

I would give you the shirt off my back...

But you want the shoes on my feet?

God and I had a conversation earlier in the day about giving. Tracy and I came to Haiti with about 100 pounds of gently used shirts, swatches of fabric, diapers, wipes, soap and pillowcases. It came in 2 duffel bags that were staying. We personally packed light and expected that we would leave a majority of our wardrobe as well. I love to give especially when I know the gift will be used and appreciated.

Back to my God conversation. He and I were talking because one of the room mamas who doesn't speak English pointed to my bright red skirt, smiled and said "love"! I picked up the skirt while on vacation this summer in Kansas City. I bought it with the intention of leaving it and its sisters, bright blue skirt and bright purple skirt. They were fun colors but not really my style of choice. It was easy to tell her the skirt was hers tomorrow. I thanked God that my bright red skirt could bring someone such joy. He then said "Give it all". I thought about how I would divvy up my skirts. Would it be to the mamas or to the teenage girls? I didn't really have any intention of handing out my shirts. I brought running shirts that I had gotten at races. They had memories attached. This one was my first half marathon, this half marathon was my best finish time, this shirt is white and will be ruined within a couple of wearings, BUT if you want me to I will give them. Later, I went up to Christopher's room to take pictures of his roommates. Mama Delva is Christopher's room mama. She's beautiful and about my height. She also doesn't speak ANY English, not a word, and my creole is even more atrocious than my hand gestures so there's smiling, hugging and cheek kisses to show our blossoming friendship. She pointed to my shoes and nodded her head. Wait. What? You want my shoes? No. What? These, God? Are you sure she doesn't just want my blue skirt? They're not even going to fit her right! These are my Chacos!!

For you who don't understand my dismay, Chacos are REALLY expensive (I'll just call them as she saw them) flip flops. They have an arch support, the intricate straps are all 1 piece that weave around your foot, and once you figure out how big to make each loop they fit you like a tailored glove. I started wearing them after my Chiropractor called me out for buying orthotics for my running shoes and then wearing $2 Old Navy flip flops the rest of the day. "You're ruining you feet and no wonder your back hurts..." I wore them all summer: to the pool, after races, to church, with skirts, shorts, casual, semi-dressy... I hope you're getting the picture. They were my go-to shoe.

God was not asking me to give what was easy and unnecessary in my life; He was asking me to give up something slightly more precious and valuable. I was going to feel this gift giving. As I slid it off my foot the thought when through my mind, "don't fit." How selfish and rude! God knew they would fit. God saw her $2 flip flops and all the work she does on her feet all day and said to me, "I care for her feet and back, too." I care for you both. I love you both.

At the end of the week, Emily (the missionary that lives at Lifeline) and I walked upstairs with my Chacos. I handed them to her and Emily told her they were hers. The hug was so big and it matched her smile. As we were leaving, Emily said that those were probably the nicest shoes she'd ever had and they would last her a long time. I came home in my old Tevas that I planned on leaving at the orphanage, but I came home with a full heart, knowing that I listened to the prompting of God. I will not lie, I was resistant when God first asked for obedience. I wanted to make excuses that would justify my disobedience. As I shared the interaction with a team member she said, "You can always buy another pair when you get home." True. But what if I never replaced them? What if I went without as a reminder that there are many people in this world who go without every day and I am not usually one of them? God challenged me to go beyond my own plans and I obeyed.

Will I continue to hear God's prompting and be obedient even if it's past my comfort level or my own expectations? I deeply desire that to be true.

My Chacos and my fun red skirt

Precious Mama Delva 

(Thank you to whoever took this picture. It's borrowed from someone on our team).