Two days ago, we recognized our 9 year-olds half birthday and Christopher's half birthday (officially 3 1/2) was yesterday. We aren't a family who normally celebrates the little milestones but in fourth grade, Ellie's class celebrates half birthdays for those kids whose birthdays fall in the summer. The precedent is goodie bags and not food. I am not a gift giver by nature so I was a little perturbed last night at 7pm when I was driving the girls to WalMart in search of cheap but not worthless trinkets that she could share with her class. I am not proud of my critical heart as we returned home and I stuffed 25 bags for sharing.
Ellie delights in the little things. Her room is filled with memorabilia (I like to think of it as junk) that she has picked up from vacations, gymnastics, friends, birthday parties, kids' meals, from the beach, from a walk, our backyard. She's told me before as I have tried to separate her from all her boxes of treasurers that each piece has a memory. As she's gotten older we now have a deal that if she can't remember the memory after a year, it may be worth thinking about parting with certain pieces. I've been thinking about it all today. One of Ellie's love languages is Quality Time. I'm pretty sure one of Ellie's love languages is NOT gifts. But she does enjoy passing on small gifts to her friends so that maybe others will have fun or feel special.
What aspect of Christopher am I missing out on today? My girls surprise me daily with their wisdom or innocence or new silliness. What is Christopher's love language? Gary Chapman wrote a book, The Five Love Languages, which I highly recommend any parent add to their repertoire of reading. It is so helpful to meet our kids' needs knowing how they appreciate seeing love lived out.
Happy Half Birthday to my oldest and youngest! Mama is praying that God is continually showing himself real in your life, that you see beauty in the everyday and that hope gives you wings to rise above the days that drag you down.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Memories of Haiti
There was a pool at our hotel. I didn't want to cause a fear of water with Christopher since he had never been swimming before. I sat down at the side of the pool, pulled my capris up past my knees, and called Christopher over to the edge of the pool. He came over to sit in my lap. I put him tightly in my arms and let his feet dangle in the pool. Before he would splash, he pulled up his swim trunks past his knees just like mama. It was so sweet. He didn't seem to want to swim but he did enjoy sitting with me splashing his feet. Maybe next trip, I will be able to get him in.
Lunch the second day of my visit, Christopher was a little sleepy from all the activities. As we sat waiting for our food, he laid his head down on my lap. I quickly realized, he was asleep. In this little way, it helped me as a mom feel that he was learning to trust me.
He shared with his friends. I don't mean the way our kids share when they have something so precious to them, with reluctance and only under stern prompting. While at the hotel, Christopher and his 2 friends made sure they each were taken care of. They each had balloons, granola bars, balls, turns with each other's cars. They'd barter and trade toys for food. Sometimes, they'd trade food for food depending on what was being offered. I can't wait to bring that heart home. On the last day, when we were sitting at the orphanage eating lunch, he came in to where we were eating from being outside. I pulled him up on my lap, continued to eat and talk with the adults and didn't really focus on him other than to offer him whatever food he wanted that was on my plate. It had been full of chicken, rice and beans, potatoes, salad, and a delicious pasta dish. It wasn't until he was climbing onto my lap for the 3rd time that I realized he was up to something. I stopped my conversation to observe him picking every last bit of meat off the chicken bones, walk his precious treat out to the small children standing at the door and hand them my food. I helped him clean my plate of all the yummy leftovers and smiled as he carefully walked the morsels over to the door. Such tender care for others. That's what I saw when I stopped to watch.
One afternoon, we were going to go on a tour of Port-au-Prince. I wanted to see more of Haiti and take pictures of the Presidential palace. We all piled into the small SUV (9 of us) driven by our fearless agency director, Patrick. About 1/2 mile down the 4-wheel drive road and 1 minor concussion later from smacking my head on the roof of the SUV, Patrick announces he doesn't feel this vehicle is safe. Not yet being in a vehicle that didn't have a cracked windshield and dents, I thought it was a funny statement! He got on the phone, argued with the man who rented him the SUV for the day, hung up and announced - "This man asked ME why we were driving their one vehicle that has no brakes - it's for emergencies only!" So different in Haiti. Needless to say, that was our one chance at a tour and I have to wait to see more of Haiti until April.
Lunch the second day of my visit, Christopher was a little sleepy from all the activities. As we sat waiting for our food, he laid his head down on my lap. I quickly realized, he was asleep. In this little way, it helped me as a mom feel that he was learning to trust me.
He shared with his friends. I don't mean the way our kids share when they have something so precious to them, with reluctance and only under stern prompting. While at the hotel, Christopher and his 2 friends made sure they each were taken care of. They each had balloons, granola bars, balls, turns with each other's cars. They'd barter and trade toys for food. Sometimes, they'd trade food for food depending on what was being offered. I can't wait to bring that heart home. On the last day, when we were sitting at the orphanage eating lunch, he came in to where we were eating from being outside. I pulled him up on my lap, continued to eat and talk with the adults and didn't really focus on him other than to offer him whatever food he wanted that was on my plate. It had been full of chicken, rice and beans, potatoes, salad, and a delicious pasta dish. It wasn't until he was climbing onto my lap for the 3rd time that I realized he was up to something. I stopped my conversation to observe him picking every last bit of meat off the chicken bones, walk his precious treat out to the small children standing at the door and hand them my food. I helped him clean my plate of all the yummy leftovers and smiled as he carefully walked the morsels over to the door. Such tender care for others. That's what I saw when I stopped to watch.
One afternoon, we were going to go on a tour of Port-au-Prince. I wanted to see more of Haiti and take pictures of the Presidential palace. We all piled into the small SUV (9 of us) driven by our fearless agency director, Patrick. About 1/2 mile down the 4-wheel drive road and 1 minor concussion later from smacking my head on the roof of the SUV, Patrick announces he doesn't feel this vehicle is safe. Not yet being in a vehicle that didn't have a cracked windshield and dents, I thought it was a funny statement! He got on the phone, argued with the man who rented him the SUV for the day, hung up and announced - "This man asked ME why we were driving their one vehicle that has no brakes - it's for emergencies only!" So different in Haiti. Needless to say, that was our one chance at a tour and I have to wait to see more of Haiti until April.
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